How to Choose Hope Even When It’s Hard with Dr. Robyne Hanley-Dafoe
Today’s guest is Behaviorist Dr. Robyne Hanley Dafoe
People are navigating stress, setbacks, and uncertainty by trying to control everything and doing it alone—which amplifies anxiety and drains performance.
Dr. Robyne’s work in this episode reframes hope as a trainable, practical skill (not “toxic optimism”), and gives listeners a grounded pathway to regain agency, build support, and move forward—especially when life feels wobbly.
In today’s conversation Dr. Robyne Hanley-Dafoe explores why hope is not the same thing as optimism—and why clinging to outcomes can backfire when life gets hard. She and Dr. Wells unpack “agency thinking” as the antidote to control spirals, then translate that mindset into practical micro-steps: get safe, get resourced, and choose the next right move.
You will learn how Dr. Robyne distinguishes hope from optimism and why that matters under pressure, how to replace control-chasing with agency, and how to use “pathway thinking” to identify one realistic next step instead of trying to solve everything at once. You’ll also learn her “get to the shore” approach for moments when you’re overwhelmed.
You will discover that hope is a skill you can practice to keep moving forward without needing perfect certainty or a guaranteed outcome.
This episode helps you break out of the loop of “I must fix this right now” and move toward a more proactive approach that is achievable and sustainable.
Key take aways:
Hope isn’t optimism; it’s forward belief without attachment.
Agency beats control: choose what you can in
When overwhelmed, “get to the shore” first.
Build pathways: one trusted person, one next step.
Connection cues safety; your nervous system settles.
“In a world of constant chaos, people need clarity. In the face of complexity, they need strategies that simplify and sustain their energy.”
Today’s Expert Guest - Dr. Robyne Hanley-Dafoe
Dr. Robyne Hanley-Dafoe’s edge is that she doesn’t treat resiliency as “toughness.” She frames it as a learnable skill set grounded in neuroscience, physiology, and psychology—and then she turns that science into simple practices people can actually use in real time (especially in high-stress seasons). Across her work, the through-line is steady capability: build agency, build pathways, and build support so you can stay well while performing to your potential.
Follow Dr. Robyne Hanley-Dafoe on Instagram & Linked In.
You can also check out her website.
I Hope So: How to Choose Hope Even When It's Hard
When the world feels divided and the future uncertain, does holding onto hope seem unthinkable?
In I Hope So, Dr. Robyne Hanley-Dafoe, the award-winning author of Stress Wisely and Calm Within the Storm, shows you how to use the power of neuroscience, physiology, and psychology to access a well of hope that already exists within you.
As an acclaimed behavioral educator and resiliency expert, Dr. Robyne Hanley-Dafoe has taught countless individuals and organizations to face the future with confidence, and now she’s here to help you live hope-filled even on your darkest days.
This podcast contains advice and information relating to health and wellness. It should be used to supplement rather than replace the advice of your doctor or another trained health professional. If you know or suspect that you have a health problem, seek your physician’s advice before embarking on any medical program or treatment. All efforts have been made to assure the accuracy of the information contained in this podcast / interview / article as of the date of publication. The author and publisher disclaim liability for any medical or other outcomes that may occur as a result of applying the methods suggested in this material.
